Chu Shijian
Up the mountain at seventy-four
Beginning one thing from zero
Public reporting on his life; the orange planting in the Ailao mountains from 2002
Is it too late to begin at this age? What he decided in the year he turned seventy-four, and the arithmetic behind it.
What actually happened?
In 2002 he was seventy-four and it was all gone: the position, the name, most of the savings, and his health with them. He and his wife went up into the Ailao mountains, leased four hundred acres of bare hillside and planted sugar oranges. Everyone assumed this was an old man filling his days. He had done arithmetic instead: an orange tree fruits in four or five years, and at seventy-four that put the first crop at seventy-nine — an age most people reach. His first year up there he lived in a work shed.
Too late is a feeling. Run it as subtraction
He never told himself he was still young. He counted: how many years until the tree fruits, how many years he probably had left, whether the first number fits inside the second. It cleared, so he went. Too late is almost always a feeling, and feelings cannot count years.
When it feels too late, write down how many years the thing needs and how many you probably have. Put the two numbers beside each other and look at them.
With nothing left, there is nothing to compare against
There was no office to return to and no earlier life to measure the hillside against, because neither existed any more. People who keep a route back tend to work the new thing with one eye on the door. His was cut, so the work got all of him.
The one still holding a just in case way back gives the new thing half his attention. The one with no way back moves at full speed.
The work shed was real, not a posture
At seventy-four he lived in a shed on the mountain, not to demonstrate humility but because that was the accommodation. Beginning again means the conditions begin again too: the pay, the standing, the bed. Accepting that is harder than accepting the age, and it is what settles the age.
What makes starting over hard is rarely the birthday. It is agreeing that the terms start over as well.
How do I use it today?
Where you are: you want to begin something at an age where everyone around you, and some part of you, says it is too late.
Ask first: how many years until this shows a result, and how many years do I probably have? And am I still holding a route back to the old thing?
Where it goes wrong: reading it as no age is too late to start. He counted first and went only because the numbers cleared. Nor should the work shed be romanticised — it was what there was, not what he chose.
Lines to keep
Too late is usually a feeling, and feelings cannot count years.
A man with no route back works with his whole attention.
The hard part of beginning again is accepting that the terms restart.
Same situation, other people are asking
Starting from zero at my age — is it too late?I'm back at the beginning. What do I do first?Everyone says I'm too old for this. How would I know?I am rebuilding from nothing and I keep reaching for my old title.Starting over · all 4 questions →If this one named what you are going through,
send it to someone who needs it, or keep it somewhere you will find it again.